in one of those moods today..tonite ??
cold, scared, shivering a lil from fever n nasal and throat pain, feelin down
lack of respect, a constant feeling of fear, and a reputaion for untrustworthiness,
i ve picked gems from personality traits and made them mine....
was good the journey i had till now....how long more
i donno...must be like the sea with tempestous storms, sea-serpents, cold winds, scary waves and irritating crew, d be life,
between phases of getting fucked up and euphoric..i lead a very insignificant life...
i mean i donno wer i fit into anyone s plan...
i don t have a plan to fit myself into..saves me the confusion..but im relally confused as to wer i fit into in god s plan, no clue is fun, faith i guess wud be my only companion
and as i weather storms n sea, n serpents, from far away come faces i cherish, lovely faces, warm faces, faces full of laughter, love,
they r not my parents, they r my pals, or long gone faces, faces that kept me warm inside, some strength, some hope, green word hope,
between bouts of drunk stupor, and calm deliriums of loneliness..hope s a word
s nice if u have a house to come to in the nights, a woman,
witha smile full of warmth u can drown in..jus drown in..and watch her and watch her n go to sleep knowing she ll be there wen u wake up....
sometimes every step i take to go home is a hurry...jus so u can go n watch her...
don need anything else in life..jus a lil home..
but the rain drops hit my eyes, sting me with their icyness, the images mingle withem n fade away, and somewer in the rocking ocean of life, my small lil boat with its worries are being tossed around, where to nobody knows, for what i donno..
it's cold, dark, and the swallowing sea is opening up its dragon belly,
and yet curiosuly, there's nothing but a loneliness that grips me on the deck, a loneliness that won't fade away even after i'm gone...